12 tips to stand up for yourself without being rude


Speaking up and standing up for yourself can be quite a challenge for some people. It can take courage—which you may feel you don’t have — especially when confronting someone higher than you on the food chain, or who has an excellent reputation.

But when it is time muster up the courage to put your foot down and say something, there are many ways to do it— without being rude. You may want to think about trying some assertiveness coaching if you really struggle with this.

1. Have confidence

Having confidence means being sure about yourself and your skills and in not letting others tell you what you can do or where you will go. Remind yourself of your skills and abilities, and draw your confidence from knowing you have them.

2. Practice

Looking in the mirror and practicing what you’d say to someone if they try to put you down can go a long way in building your confidence and your ability to stand and speak up for yourself.

3. Defend yourself in a calm and reasonable manner

Standing up and speaking up for yourself doesn’t mean you need to have a screaming match or an all-out brawl. It means having a clear head and enough confidence to defend yourself against someone. Always be polite, and maintain a calm tone of voice.

4. Be straightforward

Being straightforward doesn’t have to be rude, and if done right, it won’t be. It just means being direct in what you say, what you want and how you want it.

5. Be polite but firm

You can say and ask for things in a polite way while also being firm. To do this, you have to say it in a way that is assertive but not demanding, aggressive or mean.

6. Don’t Get Angry

Getting angry can make you lose control of your emotional intelligence, and is not a good way to stand or speak up for yourself. Doing this might lower the way you’re seen by your boss and colleagues and won’t make them listen to you or take you seriously.

7. Trust Your instincts

You have them for a reason, so use them and trust them. Doing this is a great way for you to speak up and stand up for yourself because your instincts will tell you when something isn’t right and that you should say something.

8. Learn to say no

Saying ‘no’ isn’t always a bad thing and can be a great way for you to stand up for yourself because it says that you won’t be bullied into doing things.

9. Be among the first to speak

Being one of the first people to speak in a situation can be a great way to stand up for yourself because it means that you are a go getter and are always ready and willing to get stuck into things and participate.

10. Ask questions

Asking questions is another great way to stand up for yourself because it is how you share your thoughts, get listened to and show you’re interested in something. You will be taken more seriously if you ask even just one or two intelligent questions.

11. Don’t give your power away

Giving your power away is perceived as you basically saying that you don’t want a say in how your life or career goes, you have no thoughts of your own and that you’re alright with someone else deciding everything for you.

12. Be flexible 24/7

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About Rowena Nagy

Rowena Nagy is a Journalist at The Business Woman Media. A graduate in Journalism, Media and Communications, she is passionate about in writing, travel journalism, video journalism and Public Relations.

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