I write (and speak) often about the male flatterer and why career and business women should be very wary of this particular creature. But there is one person who can be even more dangerous and that’s the flatterer of the female kind.
Some underhanded women are proficient in lying to your face and hitting you with an onslaught of outrageous compliments as a way to distract you from how they really feel towards you. Usually those feelings are jealousy or hate.
It isn’t always obvious to spot.
Some women weave the flattery into business discussions and casual conversation. Their main goal is to get you feeling comfortable with them and hopefully open up about things you probably shouldn’t be talking about.
There are many ways women do this… here are the most common:
Over-flattering your appearance
Saying how gorgeous you look or how radiant, glamorous. The more outrageous the word used to ‘compliment’ you the more she probably hates or envies you.
Over exaggerating your level of success
This usually happens in a one-on–one conversation. They don’t often do it around other people, because they don’t want to boost your profile to other people.
Gushing about your intelligence
You’re so clever, so wise, so smart! Well actually, you are. But, simply put, if she is over-egging the remarks, this woman wants to be you but most likely isn’t willing to put in the work to do so. Therefore she will be pumping you with bullshit lines like this, to hopefully trick you into sharing your advice for free.
Over-complimenting your abilities
“I don’t know HOW you do it!” Yes she does. She knows exactly how you do it as she keeps an eye on all your developments and achievements … and possibly likely stalks all your social media accounts. They want you to boast about how wonderful you are so they have ammunition to tell everyone else that you’re ‘a stuck-up bitch’. Don’t fall for it.
Probing your opinions
“What do you think of … <Insert name>?. This is the final step of the female flatterer. They build you up to make you feel like you’re “just so amazing” in their eyes. This false bond is the express way to pump you for gossip on what you think about other women in the business world.
It’s currency and a hell of a lot more valuable than cash. The second you part, they’ll find ways to spend that gossip to gain popularity. Don’t be a bank, keep your mouth shut.
