Career Woman

You’ve got this: Should I change jobs?


Dr Froswa’ Booker-Drew answers your questions, putting her years of experience and practice into the goal of solving those knotty problems that beset us, and assuring us: ‘you’ve got this’. If you’d like Froswa’ to look at your particular problem, email it to  To hear Froswa in action, listen to the podcast on why transformational social capital is critical to your career and business.

Question:  I am having a really hard time at my job.  I don’t like it and I’m trying to get out of this place as soon as I can.  This morning I received an email about the program director position with a local nonprofit. Before scheduling a phone interview for this week, they informed me that the position pays $5k more than I make now and will require significant travel. Considering the mileage I would incur (even though mileage is reimbursed from the office I suppose), I don’t know if a $5k-$8k raise is worth it. I’m not good at negotiating salary so what should I do? Karla


It’s hard to be in a work environment that you don’t like and you know it is time to leave.  There are several things that I would like for you to consider.  As much as I do not believe in remaining in jobs that are toxic and damaging to your spirit and your sanity, I am also one who believes that it is important to count the costs of any decision.  We have established that you need to leave but in leaving to take the first available opportunity that is available, are you leaving the frying pan to possibly jump in the fire?  Always lead with the end in mind.  If this is a job that you are interested in and will allow you growth opportunities, then maybe a $5-8k raise is worth getting your foot in the door.  If this is a job that is only a life raft to get out of your current situation, then it might be more damaging to your career because you are not thinking strategically about your next steps.  In our frustration, it is easy to think about short term relief than long term impact.

I would strongly encourage you think about if this job is not going to take you to where you want to go, it might be more of a headache than a help to your situation. Just make sure you are not settling and closing the door for what you really desire.  If you choose to take the position after evaluating the pros and cons as well as considering all of your options, then tell them what you need to make it worth your while.  The worse they can say is no.

In addition, interviews are not just about them determining if you are a great candidate.  Interview them to determine the culture of the organization, how they deal with conflict, leadership styles, growth opportunities.  Have your list of items that are important for you on a job and if they cannot meet your list, this might not be a good fit for you, either.  I’ve made the mistake in my some of my career choices at jumping into jobs that were not in my best interests because I didn’t take the time to ask the right questions because I was so happy someone wanted to hire me for a role close to what I wanted.  Yes, I learned a lot and I grew from the experience but I know now that all money isn’t good money.  I’ve turned a lot of things down that may appeared good but were not for me.  Saying no is a powerful, liberating thing when we know and believe we deserve better.  Whatever you decide, I support your decision because you made it, Karla.  Yes, Karla, Yes….You. Got. This.

About Dr. Froswa Booker-Drew

Dr. Froswa' Booker-Drew is a Partnership Broker. Relational Leadership Junkie. Connector. Author/Speaker/Trainer. Co-Founder, HERitage Giving Circle. She been quoted and profiled in Forbes, Ozy, Bustle, Huffington Post and other media outlets around the world. In addition, she has been asked to speak on a variety of topics such as social capital and networking, leadership, diversity, and community development to national and international audiences. This included serving as a workshop presenter at the United Nations in 2013 on the Access to Power. One of the most impactful life events for her was being a part of the documentary, Friendly Captivity, a film that followed a cast of 7 women from Dallas to India. Honors for her work include: Semi-finalist for the SMU TEDx in 2012, 2012 Outstanding African American Alumni Award from the University of Texas at Arlington, 2009 Woman of the Year Award by Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc. and Diversity Ambassador for the American Red Cross. Graduating with a PhD from Antioch University in Leadership and Change, she also attended the Jean Baker Miller Institute at Wellesley for training in Relational Cultural Theory and completed facilitator training on Immunity to Change. She has also completed training through UNICEF on Equity Based Evaluations, and is the author of 2 workbooks for women, Ready for a Revolution: 30 Days to Jolt Your Life and Rules of Engagement: Making Connections Last as well as a writer for several publications around the globe. WFAA Attention Series: Froswa Booker Drew on Vimeo

Recommended for you